She didn’t know that her words were right out of Scripture. “How many times should I forgive my brother, one, two, four?” She had dropped by initially to bring some wedding gifts for our daughter, but ended up asking how it was possible to forgive one who wrongs you over and over. Her story was heart breaking. She had generously allowed her brother to use her portion of the inheritance, an apartment, for a year, but he decided to stay on and now that her sons are looking for a house, he still refuses to move. He won’t talk to her on the street anymore. The money from the property that was sold in the countryside that was to be divided between all the children was distributed among all the siblings except her. And probably the most hurtful, he tells lies about her to her oldest child and this child no longer speaks to her. She said, “What else can I do? I have repaid evil with kindness over and over. Should I still forgive?” As a widow with six children, the inheritance is a big deal. I told her how Jesus had answered that same question (about how often one should forgive a brother) – 70×7 – and she immediately said, “He meant that you just keep on forgiving. But I can’t! And why should I?” I spoke of the poison that un-forgiveness is in our hearts but she said, “If I forgive my brother, then God will also forgive him.” She didn’t really want him forgiven by God.
Forgiveness is difficult and never deserved. Please pray for those who are caught in cycles of un-forgiveness that lead to loneliness. Usually, community comes from family circles. Among the Berbers in our city, afternoons out shopping or chatting over tea are usually spent with sisters and sisters-in-law. Holidays, weddings, and funerals are all times when families gather. She told me, “I don’t know any of my neighbors or really any colleagues from work. Only my sisters come over.”
Please pray that she and those like her will feel the weight of their sin and come to Jesus in repentance. Pray that they will know the incredible forgiveness of Christ and as they are forgiven, would also forgive.
